RV-103 is blessed with a satellite dish and had an old Dish Network receiver. It took me awhile, but eventually I learned how to manually point the dish in the right direction and choose the correct azimuth. Once I was able to lock into a satellite, that’s when we found out the receiver was too old and Dish Network required a new one.
I called Dish Network to inquire on how to get a new receiver and establish our satellite TV. After 45 minutes or so of being on hold, pushing buttons on the phone navigating the endless menus, etc I finally got a human being. The conversation went something like this…
“Ummmm….we don’t do RV’s.” was the first response from the customer service representative.
“Ummm….yes you do since I already have a dish installed on the roof and your old receiver in my RV.” I replied.
“No, I’m sure we don’t do RV’s, but we can have a technician come to your home and install a new dish and receiver.” was the reply from the customer service representative.
“Well I’m not home.” I replied, “Can’t your guy just come to the storage yard where our RV is located and give us a receiver if we sign up for one of your package deals?”
“No, we have to come to a physical address and you have to not only take our receiver, but our dish too.” said the all knowing customer service representative.
“I believe my RV is an actual physical object occupying an actual physical address at this storage yard and I can provide you our GPS coordinates if that would help. I also don’t need a dish, I already have one installed on my roof.” I said.
Silence….more silence….a clearing of the throat…and then more silence.
“Ummm….let me get my manager on the phone.” said the customer service representative.
I agreed that it might be a good idea to involve a manager. The manager came on the phone and I gave him my initial request for his business from his company. We pretty much went through the same conversation that I had with his underling. But, he seemed to want my money and business pretty badly and was willing to work with me on the problem.
“Well Sir, we can’t get past the requirement that we have to send a technician to your home. Tell you what I’m going to do for you Sir. We will send the technician to your home, set up the dish and receiver, and then you can just disconnect the receiver and take it with you on the RV and leave the spare dish home.” said the manager.
“But, I don’t want the spare dish nor do I want it stuck standing in my front yard like some perverted looking scarecrow, and why would I want him to set up the receiver in my home? I’m not going to use it at home. I just want to sign up for a package and get a new receiver for the RV.” I politely replied.
“Hmmm….well we can’t do that Sir, I’m sorry.” said the manager.
“Why?” I asked.
“Well, we can’t. Rules you know.” said the manager.
“You mean to tell me that after offering to sign a yearlong contract, pay you a guaranteed amount of money, you can’t just drop off a receiver at our RV? I can even install the receiver myself. Doesn’t that require less work and time on your company’s part and still make you money?” I reasoned.
“No Sir, we can’t.” he replied.
The manager wasn’t quite willing to let go of my promised money just yet though.
“Sir, since you already had an old receiver of ours, what we can do is sell you a new receiver.” he said.
“I thought receivers came free if you sign up for a package deal. How much is this receiver?” I asked.
“Well Sir, depending on what you want such as HD TV, DVR, etc….it’s going to run you about $250 give or take a few dollars.” he said.
“So let me get this straight, you cannot deliver a receiver to my RV that I would be entitled to free of charge if I sign up for a package deal, but you can charge me for a receiver and deliver it to my RV? Is that right?” I asked through clenched teeth.
“Yes Sir, it’s a pretty good offer I think.” he said.
I thanked him for his time and hung up. I then called Direct TV and pretty much went through the entire tortured experience again. I think the people I talked with there are blood relatives of the ones at Dish Network.
So, at this time we have chosen not to have satellite TV until one of the companies decide to start hiring college educated people with some common sense. We have found we can use our money for other things such as pocketing it. In the meantime, we are using the satellite dish on the RV to try to listen for ET. I am pretty optimistic that we can succeed at that task far better than finding someone with an education and common sense at Dish Network or Direct TV.
